Dating Tips and Self Awareness

Self Awareness and Dating

I’ve noticed that when people ask me for relationship advice a recurring questions is, “Why can’t I find anyone.” There are many ways people arrive at this conclusion. I’ll list them and put a self-awareness twist on each. In this way you can move in a different direction and find out how much power you really have to affect your dating life.

1. I keep going out with bad boys/girls. Different direction: I get myself healthy enough to recognize that it’s OK to treat myself well and go out with positive people.

2. I feel lonely. Different direction: I actively work on things that resolve why I am lonely and emphasize learning about myself before dating.

3. Where can I meet people? Different direction: When you get yourself healthy and do the things you love you move in circles where you attract people who are like you.

4. All men/women are terrible. Different direction: There are a lot of great people out there we just need to learn to accept them into our lives and be healthy enough to encourage good people to go out with us.

Hope these ideas help navigate the dating waters. Dating is ultimately what you make it; you have a lot of control over where it goes.

Have a great dating day,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

Be Kind to Yourself

People are frequently quite hard on themselves and are constantly concerned about how well they are doing things. I help people learn how to be kind with themselves. Try these ideas today to be kind with yourself.

1. Praise yourself for something you did today.
2. Do something positive that you enjoy.
3. Repeat every day.

Getting in the habit of doing these simple things can feel different at first but, over time, it leads to us doing things that make us feel good. It's great when we can rely on ourselves rather than others to make us feel good.

Next time you feel completely stressed out and about to explode, take a moment and try these steps instead of being hard on yourself. We are all amazing creatures that need caring and affection and who better to start that process than ourselves?

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

Conflict: It's About You

I recently facilitated a workshop on conflict resolution and I found it fascinating that almost everyone thought conflict was about the other person. I heard many comments about how the other person would be so much easier to get along with if they only did this or that but very little about what each participant would do himself or herself to improve the situation.

Conflict can be a horrible mess or it can be an opportunity for growth and increased understanding. The challenge for many people is that it requires putting our own issues to the side in order to connect with someone else. Try thinking of the following ideas the next time you feel a conflict coming on.

1. Be aware of your personal triggers. What sets you off?

2. Remember that you decide how you react to situations.

3. Only you can let someone make you mad.

4. Understand it’s not personal, people aren't trying to slight you in general.

5. Learn to recognize exactly when someone is getting to you.

5. Where do you feel it? Identify where you feel the conflict in your body.

6. Do something different to interrupt the pattern.

If you deliberately give some thought to these areas you will find that you can reduce the way conflict affects you and move toward more positive interactions. It takes some discipline but it also affords you a way to not let conflict consume your life.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

Dating Tips 101

One proven way to find dates is to work on yourself first and do the things you love.

When you work on yourself and do things you love you begin moving your life in a direction where you move amongst people who have interests like yours. Find what it is that really makes you happy and move in those circles. In that way, you increase your chances of meeting someone who actually shares your interests and philosophy.

Get yourself as healthy as possible and you will attract the same. The better you feel about yourself the more it wards off the people who love misery. You attract what you project.

A final thought. I realize we are in an online environment here but there is a lot to be said for giving up the safety and fantasy of sitting at a computer for the greater challenge of meeting people face to face. Get out there and show people who you are in person, you deserve a healthy, rewarding relationship.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

You're Worth It

Have you ever met someone who seems to have strong self-esteem but chains themselves to someone else or always sabotages their actions. We all do things that keep us from succeeding and we do so at an unconscious level. The messages we learned early in life keep holding us back and telling us that we can't achieve what we want in life. The good news is that we can change those messages by following some basic steps.

1. Identify the message. Ask yourself, "Where did this message begin."
2. Ask yourself if the message is true. For example, do you really not deserve to succeed?
3. Think of the opposite of the message and do that instead. Make it a positive message that gets you where you want to go.
4. Every time a negative, limiting message comes into your head do these steps until it is gone.

It will take you some time to get good at changing your messages but you will do it if you stick with it over time. Plan on spending at least 30 days practicing the new behavior and then check in with yourself to see how you're doing. You may be very happy with the results. If you're not, it looks like you have another message to work on.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

Interrupting Negative Relationship Patterns

Many of us learn how to function in relationships from what we saw our parents do or learned from our friends. The patterns we learn are often hard to move away from even when they are consistently negative or don't make us feel better as people.

Why is it then that people seem to stay stuck in non-productive relationships rather than working on finding new and more rewarding ways of doing things? In my experience it is due to our comfort in the familiar and fear of the unknown. As strange as it sounds when viewed objectively, we often stay with what we know because we think it is more comfortable.

The great thing is that we can often experience far greater joy and reward in doing something new. Learning new behaviors that lead us in positive directions can result in resolving chronic relationship problems, finding new and positive relationships and treating ourselves better.

Try this sometime: Examine your existing relationship and decide on one thing that could change to improve the relationship. Work on that one thing consistently over time. Seek outside help if you need an objective point of view. Once you start establishing a new pattern things will begin moving in a different direction.

People often tell me they never knew their relationships were so stuck until they introduced new behaviors. They are often surprised at how good things can get and frequently tell me that they are glad they consciously worked on breaking the patterns they had established in their relationships and trying new ones.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach

What Is a Life Coach?

People sometimes ask me, "What on earth is a life coach?" There are many answers but I answer that I help people achieve their dreams and I listen to their hopes. Coaching is the process of working with a qualified person to help you develop a plan that works for you. You get to make the decisions.

If you want to find out what you really want out of life, a life coach can help you formulate a plan for success. A life coach helps you clarify your strengths and areas for improvement and supports you as you move toward success. I help you identify what is going on in your life, what your dreams are and where you want to go. A coach partners with you and helps you build in accountability for your plan for the future. Life coaching gives you the ability to transform your life and choose your destiny. There is no magic to coaching because it is a common sense process that helps you focus in ways you may not have thought about before.

I enjoy working with people like you who are motivated to transform their lives. It is a privilege to watch people grow and discover their strengths and talents. Coaching helps people identify the patterns of behavior that block the path to their dreams. I use my experience to help you see things in a different way and gives you a neutral outside perspective. A coach can help you identify the behaviors that got you where you are and works with you to achieve success as you define it.

Think of a life coach as someone who will be in your side, who helps you build on your strengths, and who believes in the potential you have inside.

Please feel free to contact me if you have any other questions about how coaching can help you.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach

A Different Perspective to Improve Relationships

It's easy to focus exclusively on our own perspective in relationships. We tend to think of our relationship issues in terms we are familiar with and this often means we keep repeating the same patterns and acting the same way we always have. This works well if we get great results but what happens if our behaviors always lead to less than satisfactory relationships.

We all know people who can never quite resolve differences with someone else and we watch them repeat the same pattern over and over. I've noticed that it is helpful to let in some new information and get a fresh perspective. When we let new information in it's like opening a window in a stuffy room, we can breathe better and think more clearly. Think about some of the following ideas next time you feel stuck in your relationship.

1. Who can I turn to that is not involved in my situation and can give me impartial advice?
2. Am I willing to let an outside person offer me advice?
3. How open am I to talking about personal issues with an outside person?
4. How open am I to doing the work necessary to move in a different direction?
5. What actions will I commit to doing?

Think about these questions and keep in mind that none of us has all the answers but we all have the ability to acquire new information if we are open enough. Let some air in, enjoy a fresh perspective and start moving in a new direction.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

Increase Your Self-Esteem

People frequently ask me how they can boost their self-esteem, especially when they're feeling down. Building ourselves up is a lifelong and continuing process. There are no set rules on how we should feel on any given day but there are some things that can help us boost how we feel about ourselves. The great thing about self-esteem is that you can increase it at any time. All it takes is some conscious action. Here are some ideas to help you get started.

• Do things you love doing.
• Celebrate your successes.
• Focus on positive things.
• Associate with people that support you.
• Listen to your inner voice.
• Keep moving forward even when it seems difficult.
• Take small steps but always keep stepping.
• Develop goals you are working toward.
• Do nice things for yourself that don't cost money.
• Look in the mirror and say positive things to yourself.

Building self esteem is a process of continuing to support and celebrate ourselves. It doesn't come all at once or even stay constant but we can make sure it is strong by staying active and continuing to move forward. There will always be negative things that come along but if you work on increasing your self-esteem, you will find that you can weather any storm.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

Tap into Your Creativity

People think that they have to be artists in order to be creative but anyone can use this skill to create success in their lives. Being creative simply means creating something where there wasn't something before. It helps us tap into doing the things we love and exploring new avenues. Creativity can help us get out of a rut and discover new and exciting pursuits. Think of the following ideas when you are ready to get creative.

1. What do you love doing?
2. What can you create right this moment?
3. How could creating that thing improve your life?
4. How will you feel after you create this thing?
5. What will you do to continue being creative?

You will notice that these questions are designed to help you think about your creativity. Remember that there are no right or wrong answers or good or bad approaches. You get to decide what you want to work on and where you want to go. Take it easy on yourself: start with small steps and gradually work on bigger projects. The act of tapping into your creativity regularly will help you come up with ideas that could change your life.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

Building Confidence

People often ask me how to increase their confidence. It's been my experience that people build their confidence by doing things they enjoy and experiencing both success and failure. The common denominator is that confident people tend to be those who confront the challenges in their lives and learn from the outcomes. Eleanor Roosevelt said,

"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do."

It is the action of doing things purposefully toward some goal that will help you become a confident person. We all have an incredible ability to take on any challenge in our lives.

Try taking on a challenge today and keep doing it until you are an expert. Put one foot in front of the other and keep walking. Then take on another challenge and keep going. In time you'll wonder why you ever lacked confidence at all.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

Don't Wait Until It's Too Late - Do It Now

We spend so much time thinking about the things we could have done that we forget the power we have to change things in the present. It's easy to get stuck in a mode where we replay past events or make up future possiblities but that never seems to affect the present.

Spending more time consciously working on the present is the only way to change our destiny. If you start today by telling yourself that you will work on something occurring in the present you will suddenly have command of your destiny and power to change whatever you want.

Try doing that today; find something that you keep hoping would happen in the past or future and re-focus it in the present. Ask yourself what you can do right now to affect something in your life right now. Doing stuff in the present helps us take our minds off all the things we have no control of and focuses our energy on the things we can change.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

Have a Thought, Take an Action

Our thought patterns can help us have a great day or something else. Here's what some smart people have to say about it.


There is no chance, no destiny, no fate, that can hinder or control the firm resolve of a determined soul. Ella Wheeler Wilcox.

Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking. Marcus Aurelius.

With the new day comes new strength and new thoughts. Eleanor Roosevelt.

Real generosity toward the future lies in giving all to the present. Albert Camus.


Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

What is The Law of Attraction?

You hold within you the ability to move your life in any direction you choose. The way you behave each day predicts the results you will get in life. It's a straightforward formula that puts you in charge. You get to decide whether you succeed or whether you stagnate.

You've probably heard of The Secret, a popular book that talks about attracting what you want in life by what you put out. This ability to be a magnet for things you want in life is called the Law of Attraction. Here are some basic things you can do to start attracting great things.

1. Focus on the thing you want to happen, this is your goal.
2. Determine three actions you can take to achieve that specific goal.
3. Pick one action and start following through on it today.
4. When you've achieved one goal, move on to the next.
5. Take time to celebrate yourself and your accomplishment.

The purposeful act of following through and taking action trains your mind to take on challenges. When you achieve a goal it gives you strength and courage to keep moving forward in life. You begin to see the power you have over your circumstances.

I help people transform their lives every day and each one of them starts with a desire to accomplish something that is important to them. The key to success is going from the thinking phase to the doing part. Try working through the five steps we've outlined and keep doing it until you succeed. Along the way you will be practicing the skills necessary to attract great abundance in the world.

Have a successful day,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

The Law of Attraction

You hold within you the ability to move your life in any direction you choose. The way you behave each day predicts the results you will get in life. It's a straightforward formula that puts you in charge. You get to decide whether you succeed or whether you stagnate.

You've probably heard of The Secret, a popular book that talks about attracting what you want in life by what you put out. This ability to be a magnet for things you want in life is called the Law of Attraction. Here are some basic things you can do to start attracting great things.

1. Focus on the thing you want to happen, this is your goal.
2. Determine three actions you can take to achieve that specific goal.
3. Pick one action and start following through on it today.
4. When you've achieved one goal, move on to the next.
5. Take time to celebrate yourself and your accomplishment.

The purposeful act of following through and taking action trains your mind to take on challenges. When you achieve a goal it gives you strength and courage to keep moving forward in life. You begin to see the power you have over your circumstances.

I help people transform their lives every day and each one of them starts with a desire to accomplish something that is important to them. The key to success is going from the thinking phase to the doing part. Try working through the five steps we've outlined and keep doing it until you succeed. Along the way you will be practicing the skills necessary to attract great abundance in the world.

Have a successful day,

Guy
Life Coach

Heal before You Move On

Many people go through life hanging on to trauma from the past. It seems paradoxical but it is greatly beneficial to try to heal past challenges before moving forward in life. When we heal the past we erase all the garbled stuff that clogs up our psyche. It gives us a chance to hit the reset button and do whatever we want with the rest of your life.

I am not recommending that you wallow in self-pity or live a life of despair. We benefit from acknowledging the past and then moving forward. If you have some issue that affects your functioning today why not do something to move past it? Once you get past it you will be ready to grow without having that issue holding you back in any way. Here's how you can get started working on putting the past behind you.

1. Think of something that happened to you that still affects you today.
2. Acknowledge that it exists.
3. Write down how it affects you in your present life.
4. How would your life be different if this issue were not in the picture?
5. What are you willing to do to move beyond the issue?

Your answers to these ideas will help you create a starting point so that you can create success in your life without the the past weighing you down. Plus, you'll just be happier.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach

Dream Big

If you've ever wanted to achieve something you've probably noticed that you get the results that you work on. If you have a small goal you tend to work toward that, if you have a larger vision you tend to move toward it.

A great way to accomplish almost anything is to start with a dream, a specific thing you would like to see happen or that excites you. The dream will guide all the actions to follow. Think about the following questions as you pursue your dream.

1. What would I love to do, what is my dream?

2. What are the reasons this dream is important to me?

3. What small action can I take today to make my dream come true?

If you dream big you are constantly moving toward expansive and exciting horizons. It doesn't mean that all you do are grand, sweeping thing, it just requires that you work toward something that really helps you stretch and grow as a person.

Regards,

Guy

Life Coach

A Successful You

Ever wonder what the difference is between those who are successful and those who aren't. Often the key element is your thoughts. Your thoughts impact everything you do (or don't do) in life. Think about it, if you wake up in the morning thinking it will be a dreary day then how is your day likely to go? What if you arise and tell yourself that great things are going to happen, how would your day look in that case?

Success starts with a mindset and is followed by actions. If you think you are successful then you will do things in that vein. Think about the following questions as you begin to add to your success.

1. What are the great things about me?
2. What possibilities lay in store for me today?
3. What have I been successful at before and how did I do it?
4. What do I want to be successful at today?
5. What will I do today to reach for that success?

As you begin thinking positively remember to take time for yourself and treat yourself well. Do things you enjoy and incorporate them into all aspects of your life. Most of all, believe in yourself and your amazing success.

Regards,

Guy
Life Coach

Empathy Helps Build Better Relationships

It's easy to become so focused on our own experience that we forget that other people exist. In relationships, walking in someone else's shoes is a great approach to really understanding other people and helps us build empathy for others. Empathy is the ability to understand someone else's experience and point of view.

People often ask me why it is that someone does such and such or this and that. I suggest that we can figure out what people are going through and understand them much better if we just put ourselves in their situation. In this way, we can learn about them without projecting our own needs and opinions on them. Try a few of the following things to increase your empathic ability:

1. Listen actively without talking.
2. Put yourself in that person's situation and imagine you are going through the same thing.
3. Ask questions that allow the person to tell you more about themselves instead of yes and no questions.
4. Keep in mind that what you are hearing isn't about you; it's about them.
5. Try to accept anything the person says as simply their reality rather than something you have to react to.

Try these a few times over a period of time. Empathy is about really understanding that there are other valid points of view in the world. Those perspectives may not be ours but they mean as much to that person as our worldview does to us. Once you can connect with someone else's reality, you're own your way to really understanding other people and showing them that you respect where they are coming from.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach

If You Only Had One Week to Live

Perspective frequently makes the difference in the choices we make in life. If we feel a sense of urgency we are more likely to try to accomplish a task. People motivate themselves in different ways but a key characteristic of those who create movement is a sense that they have to get it done.

As you may have heard, we only have one life to live so we might as well make the most of it. Why then is it that people spend incredible amounts of time and effort on everything but what is truly meaningful to them. It's almost as if someone told us along the way that we couldn't accomplish what we wanted in life. So we settle for what comes our way, focusing on subsistence rather than growth. A positive way to begin redirecting your thoughts is to ask yourself, "If I only had one week to live, what would I want to do?"

Life is a precious and finite gift. Why would anyone choose to live it without doing something they really love? Think about your own situation and think about what you really want to do in life. Then put some thought into what you can actually do to incorporate your dream into your everyday life. As you begin working on your dream you will find that you begin feeling happier and more balanced because you are connecting with who you really are. Life is just funner when you're doing stuff you like.

Build in some urgency starting today. What would you do if you only had a week to live? Now start making it happen.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach

Finding Inspiration in Life

People have told me over the years that they feel most inspired when they are doing the things that really move them in their hearts. Have you ever had the experience of doing something you really love and suddenly hours have passed and you didn't even realize it? This is what being inspired is about.

Being inspired is living the life we are supposed to. If you love to dance, dance. If you love sports, play sports. If you love writing, write. It's all about finding that thing that calls to you and incorporating it into your life. It doesn't matter if you don't become famous, it just matters that you are doing that which you love.

When you live a life that includes the things that really inspire you, you begin a fascinating process where your life moves in the direction of your inspiration. People start to recognize you for who you are and your gift touches them because they can tell it means something to you.

Try devoting some time in your life to your inspiration. You'll feel more grounded and balanced when you pursue what you love.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach

Nothing Happens without Taking Action

Have you ever met someone with big dreams but who never does anything about them? Frequently, the only thing that separates those who succeed from those who stay stuck is the ability to take action. It sounds obvious but action is a key element in helping us move forward in life. Many individuals remain in the planning or idea phases of life, living with vague hopes that someday they will achieve something.

I'll let you in on a secret. The people who succeed move their ideas from abstract to concrete by taking action. How does one do it? Here's another amazing secret. You actually have to do stuff to succeed. The great thing is that you can begin this process at any time. Taking action feels great and it yields positive results because we are actually taking charge of our lives.

Think about the difference between the person who dreams all day and the one who dreams but also does something to make them come true. Here are a couple ideas that will help you move toward action.

1. Think about something you would love to achieve.
2. Come up with five ideas that might help you start working on it.
3. Pick the idea that makes the most sense to you.
4. Take action and do it. Set a short-term date by when you will finish it.

Nothing happens without you taking action. What will you take action on today?

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

Nothing Happens without Action

Have you ever met someone with big dreams but who never does anything about them? Frequently, the only thing that separates those who succeed from those who stay stuck is the ability to take action. It sounds obvious but action is a key element in helping us move forward in life. Many individuals remain in the planning or idea phases of life, living with vague hopes that someday they will achieve something.

I'll let you in on a secret. The people who succeed move their ideas from abstract to concrete by taking action. How does one do it? Here's another amazing secret. You actually have to do stuff to succeed. The great thing is that you can begin this process at any time. Taking action feels great and it yields positive results because we are actually taking charge of our lives.

Think about the difference between the person who dreams all day and the one who dreams but also does something to make them come true. Here are a couple ideas that will help you move toward action.

1. Think about something you would love to achieve.
2. Come up with five ideas that might help you start working on it.
3. Pick the idea that makes the most sense to you.
4. Take action and do it. Set a short-term date by when you will finish it.

Nothing happens without you taking action. What will you take action on today?

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach in Reno

What is Your Dream Life?

Our dreams are a reflection of who we really are. I'm not talking about the dreams where you are riding a horse through the shopping mall, these are the dreams about what you really want to do with your life. These dreams come from a genuine place inside you and reflect your true self. Perhaps they link you to when you were a child and wished you would be an actor or when you graduated from high school and anticipated being a great mathematician.

Then life gets in the way but it doesn't have to be that way. You can literally tap into your dreams at any time and give them the prominent place in your life that they deserve. Ask yourself the following questions as you connect with what you really want to do with your life.

1. If money or subsistence were of no concern, what would I do with my life above all else?

2. What am I really good at that brings me joy and I could do forever?

3. What career path would bring me true joy in life?

4. What can I do for hours without thinking about time?

The answers to these questions will help you start steering your life toward what you really want to do. You call the shots and get to decide in what direction you move. You choose whether you follow the path toward your dreams or follow an alternate course. I wish you great success in your journey.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

On Uncertainty and Doubt

It seems like everywhere you turn nowadays you get some message about doubt, doom and gloom. The ironic thing is that doubt can actually be a catalyst for creating great things in our lives. Here's what some smart people say about the subject.

Alfred Korzybski:

There are two ways to slide easily through life: to believe everything or to doubt everything; both ways save us from thinking.

Andre Gide:

Believe those who are seeking the truth; doubt those who find it.

Erich Fromm:

Creativity requires the courage to let go of certainties.

Frank Crane:

You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough.

Franklin Delano Roosevelt:

The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.


Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

Are You Experienced?

Your personal experience deeply affects everything you do including how you see the world. Here's what some smart people have to say about the subject.

Samuel Smiles:

We learn wisdom from failure much more than from success. We often discover what will do, by finding out what will not do; and probably he who never made a mistake never made a discovery.

Douglas Adams:

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.

Ethel Barrymore:

You must learn day by day, year by year, to broaden your horizon. The more things you love, the more you are interested in, the more you enjoy, the more you are indignant about, the more you have left when anything happens.

Iris Murdock:

We can only learn to love by loving.

Pearl S. Buck:

One faces the future with one's past.


Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

You Already Have the Answers in You

Deep inside you live the answers to the questions you have about life. Many people spend their entire lives ignoring these inner thoughts but those who listen to them benefit from following a life of great fulfillment. The reason that we have the answers inside of us is that we are born with certain hopes, dreams and talents that are unique to each of us. Nobody else in the world has these talents and only we can provide the subtle variation and specialization of these particular gifts. On the other end are people who are ready to connect with us and use our talents because it makes sense to them.

When you look within you for the answer to life’s questions you begin to connect with who you really are and you live a life of less effort and strain. Following the voice inside you allows you to live comfortably because you are following the path that makes sense to you. The next time you are looking for answers from someone else consider the following questions:

• What does my inner voice say I should do?

• Does this answer reflect who I really am inside?

• Am I blocking the true answer in any way?

• What small step can I take today to follow up on this answer?

Learn to trust your inner voice and you begin the process of validating yourself. We each have the answers to what we need in life inside us. It is our choice whether we listen.

Regards,

Guy
Reno Life Coach

The Answers Are already in You

Deep inside you live the answers to the questions you have about life. Many people spend their entire lives ignoring these inner thoughts but those who listen to them benefit from following a life of great fulfillment. The reason that we have the answers inside of us is that we are born with certain hopes, dreams and talents that are unique to each of us. Nobody else in the world has these talents and only we can provide the subtle variation and specialization of these particular gifts. On the other end are people who are ready to connect with us and use our talents because it makes sense to them.

When you look within you for the answer to life’s questions you begin to connect with who you really are and you live a life of less effort and strain. Following the voice inside you allows you to live comfortably because you are following the path that makes sense to you. The next time you are looking for answers from someone else consider the following questions:

• What does my inner voice say I should do?

• Does this answer reflect who I really am inside?

• Am I blocking the true answer in any way?

• What small step can I take today to follow up on this answer?
  

Learn to trust your inner voice and you begin the process of validating yourself. We each have the answers to what we need in life inside us. It is our choice whether we listen.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

The Difference Between Talking and Listening

A lot of people have been conditioned to believe that they need to talk a lot. We've all met the person who seems to be in love with the sound of their voice and rarely lets people into the conversation. What we sometimes forget is that communication is over 90% non-verbal which means that talking is just a small part of what we're supposed to be doing.

Yet millions of people wake up every day ready to tell the world something rather than learning something from the world. We spend our time trying to tell our story rather than gaining more insight into others' experiences. Think about your own style: Do you talk more or do you listen more? What would happen if you shifted your style just slightly. Highly effective people understand that getting their point across is often as much about understanding someone else's point of view as it is putting one's own opinion into the mix.

Here are some tips to help you add to your communication skills:

1. Try to listen more than you talk.
2. Ask open-ended questions.
3. Try not to think of the next thing you're going to say.
4. Try not to think of the perfect rebuttal.
5. Stay away from questions that lead the conversation in a certain direction.
6. Let people say what they want and give them the space to do so.
7. Listen.
8. Did I mention listening?

The key skill we ignore in life is listening. It's incredible what we learn when we take the time to really listen to someone. Suddenly we understand people better and can make decisions based on rich information. We avoid misunderstandings and we connect with people on a deeper level.

Perhaps the most powerful proof that listening helps improve our lives is that it allows us to breathe. We don't have to fill up space, we don't have to think of witty things to say and we get to learn all kinds of interesting things about others and relax more.

Have a great listening day,

Guy
Life Coach in Reno

Finding Hope in the New Year

This new year brings a lot of talk about how difficult things are. Sometimes it just helps to realize that you have the ability to remain hopeful. Here's what some smart people have to say about hope:

Alexander Graham Bell:

When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us.


Allan K. Chalmers:

The Grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.


Dale Carnegie:

Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.


Dorothy Thompson:

Fear grows in darkness; if you think there's a bogeyman around, turn on the light.


Have a hopeful day,

Guy
Life Coach in Reno

Dating Tips for the New Year

So you want to make this the year of dating excitement. Perhaps you want to find that ideal person who will finally make you happy. Here are some tips on what to do to make 2009 a great dating year.

1. Work on yourself. Getting to know who you are and what you really love in life will help you surround yourself with people attracted to who the real you.

2. Say goodbye to the bad boys and bad girls. Sure a roller coaster can be fun but when you ride it for the one millionth time you can get sick and tired. Constant chaos is not an accurate measure of a fulfilling relationship.

3. Look for a real person. Finding a great relationship is about getting to know people for who they are on the inside rather than how beautiful or rich a person is.

4. Don't give up who you are. A great relationship is supposed to compliment who you are rather than taking away your self-worth. Treat yourself well and demand the same from others.

5. Treat yourself well. Relationships are for building you up not tearing you down.

6. Work on yourself. It cannot be said enough that when you work through your own issues you will be much healthier to meet great people. Misery loves company but so does healthiness.

Kick off 2009 with a great attitude and you will be on your way to enjoying great dates.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach in Reno

Trusting Your Inner Voice

Nothing is a beautiful as the voice inside you. Pay attention to it and you can live a life of great success and happiness. Ignore it and you will move in any direction.

Over the years, my clients have shown me how important it is to find your inner voice. Your inner voice is that part of you that tells you what you need to be doing in life. Many of us do everything possible to silence that voice.

It may sound simplistic but finding your voice is the first step in figuring out what you want to do with the rest of your life. You may already be listening to it but, for those of you who have yet to discover it, try asking yourself the following questions:

1. If I could choose any career in life what would it be?
2. What is the talent I possess that I could use to bring joy into my life?
3. What message(s) is my inner voice sending me?
4. How would my life be different if I listened to my inner voice?
5. What will I commit to doing today to achieve what my inner voice tells me to?

When you answer these questions you begin thinking about what it is that you could be doing right now to bring incredible happiness into your life. Imagine what your life would look like if their were no barriers, no negative thoughts, no compromises and where you celebrated your talents every day. What would your life look like if you achieved your true hopes and dreams?

Best wishes finding your voice,

Guy
Life Coach Reno