Dating Tips and Self Awareness

Self Awareness and Dating

I’ve noticed that when people ask me for relationship advice a recurring questions is, “Why can’t I find anyone.” There are many ways people arrive at this conclusion. I’ll list them and put a self-awareness twist on each. In this way you can move in a different direction and find out how much power you really have to affect your dating life.

1. I keep going out with bad boys/girls. Different direction: I get myself healthy enough to recognize that it’s OK to treat myself well and go out with positive people.

2. I feel lonely. Different direction: I actively work on things that resolve why I am lonely and emphasize learning about myself before dating.

3. Where can I meet people? Different direction: When you get yourself healthy and do the things you love you move in circles where you attract people who are like you.

4. All men/women are terrible. Different direction: There are a lot of great people out there we just need to learn to accept them into our lives and be healthy enough to encourage good people to go out with us.

Hope these ideas help navigate the dating waters. Dating is ultimately what you make it; you have a lot of control over where it goes.

Have a great dating day,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

Be Kind to Yourself

People are frequently quite hard on themselves and are constantly concerned about how well they are doing things. I help people learn how to be kind with themselves. Try these ideas today to be kind with yourself.

1. Praise yourself for something you did today.
2. Do something positive that you enjoy.
3. Repeat every day.

Getting in the habit of doing these simple things can feel different at first but, over time, it leads to us doing things that make us feel good. It's great when we can rely on ourselves rather than others to make us feel good.

Next time you feel completely stressed out and about to explode, take a moment and try these steps instead of being hard on yourself. We are all amazing creatures that need caring and affection and who better to start that process than ourselves?

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno

Conflict: It's About You

I recently facilitated a workshop on conflict resolution and I found it fascinating that almost everyone thought conflict was about the other person. I heard many comments about how the other person would be so much easier to get along with if they only did this or that but very little about what each participant would do himself or herself to improve the situation.

Conflict can be a horrible mess or it can be an opportunity for growth and increased understanding. The challenge for many people is that it requires putting our own issues to the side in order to connect with someone else. Try thinking of the following ideas the next time you feel a conflict coming on.

1. Be aware of your personal triggers. What sets you off?

2. Remember that you decide how you react to situations.

3. Only you can let someone make you mad.

4. Understand it’s not personal, people aren't trying to slight you in general.

5. Learn to recognize exactly when someone is getting to you.

5. Where do you feel it? Identify where you feel the conflict in your body.

6. Do something different to interrupt the pattern.

If you deliberately give some thought to these areas you will find that you can reduce the way conflict affects you and move toward more positive interactions. It takes some discipline but it also affords you a way to not let conflict consume your life.

Take care,

Guy
Life Coach Reno